Dear Dexter,
You are 22 months old today.
It amazes me how quickly you are growing. This last month has flown by and I feel like I have missed it. And missed you.
You are almost talking in full sentences now. You string three words together all the time.
Your favourite thing to say at the moment is Love you.
Love you cows. Love you grass. Love you mummy.
It melts my heart when you say that.
You also love Lola. You kiss her and cuddle her all the time. Sometimes too much. Like when you climb in the bassinet with her...
You are such a beautiful child. You have the most gorgeous laugh.
Everyone is captivated by your cheeky smile and your curls.
I hope you stop growing up so quickly. I just want to cuddle you forever.
Love Mummy
We're not poor... But if I don't stop spending we probably will be
About Me
- tattoomummy
- 23 year old going on 50. I take my carry basket to the farmers markets every week and Avoid getting a tan at all costs. I also have lots of tattoos. Two beautiful children and a "Hubby". And an obsession with cooking - moving into a place that doesn't have an oven...
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
Sunday, May 22, 2011
My life of late
Because I am narcissistic naive enough to think people I don't know care so much about my blog life that they have been wondering what I've been up to, I'll fill you all in.
I had a baby four weeks a go (but you knew that).
I got a staph infection two weeks a go. It's lovely. You should see it. ACTUALLY you should have seen it when I was at the hospital at 2am getting it lanced because it was oozing out my skin. Told you. LOVELY.
We (all of us) are moving in with my parents. And my two teenage sisters. Crazy us, hey? It's... full on, to say the least. I thought it would have been different to the way it is. I thought because everyone is older it would be a little more civil, but it's not. Girls fight, no matter the age.
Maddi (20) likes confrontation... She enjoys arguing. And she hates when I don't bite back. It's SO satisfying to win. (Take THAT! Maddison)
Michellie is a 16 year old girl... need i say more? Except because mum works ridiculous hours, she's not used to someone asking her to clean her room constantly until it gets done. Mum is just too tired. So now, here I am. Because if it doesn't get done, I get to hear Dad yell about it. And life is much more pleasant when Dad is happy. (He stalks around the house and snaps at people who look at him the wrong way).
I wonder if he'd try and ground me now if I pissed him off?
So anyway... I'm now cooking for six. Cooking healthier meals than they've had in ages, because usually they're all eating on the go with crazy schedules they're all keeping. I'm enjoying it, but it's a little annoying.
I asked them (family) if there was anything in particular they wanted to eat at the start of the week. No one said shit.
Then, tonight, I made a chicken pasta (minced chicken, fresh tomatoes, mushrooms, spring onion, white wine, sour cream, some herbs - delish!) and I asked Mum if Dad would eat it. She replied:
"I think he just wants a steak."
THEN FUCKING TELL ME YOU WANT A STEAK WHEN I ASK!!!
I'm not the best lately. I'm struggling.
I don't think I have post natal depression.
It's everything building up.
It's nothing to do with having two kids. I love both of them. Not wanting to shake them or anything.
I don't want them to go away so I can get some sleep, I want everything else to go away.
I want moving house to go away.
I want staph infection to go away.
I want blood pressure issues to go away.
I want money issues to go away.
I want it all to go away so I can get some sleep.
So my kids don't suffer.
So Pat doesn't suffer.
So I don't suffer!
I had a baby four weeks a go (but you knew that).
I got a staph infection two weeks a go. It's lovely. You should see it. ACTUALLY you should have seen it when I was at the hospital at 2am getting it lanced because it was oozing out my skin. Told you. LOVELY.
We (all of us) are moving in with my parents. And my two teenage sisters. Crazy us, hey? It's... full on, to say the least. I thought it would have been different to the way it is. I thought because everyone is older it would be a little more civil, but it's not. Girls fight, no matter the age.
Maddi (20) likes confrontation... She enjoys arguing. And she hates when I don't bite back. It's SO satisfying to win. (Take THAT! Maddison)
Michellie is a 16 year old girl... need i say more? Except because mum works ridiculous hours, she's not used to someone asking her to clean her room constantly until it gets done. Mum is just too tired. So now, here I am. Because if it doesn't get done, I get to hear Dad yell about it. And life is much more pleasant when Dad is happy. (He stalks around the house and snaps at people who look at him the wrong way).
I wonder if he'd try and ground me now if I pissed him off?
So anyway... I'm now cooking for six. Cooking healthier meals than they've had in ages, because usually they're all eating on the go with crazy schedules they're all keeping. I'm enjoying it, but it's a little annoying.
I asked them (family) if there was anything in particular they wanted to eat at the start of the week. No one said shit.
Then, tonight, I made a chicken pasta (minced chicken, fresh tomatoes, mushrooms, spring onion, white wine, sour cream, some herbs - delish!) and I asked Mum if Dad would eat it. She replied:
"I think he just wants a steak."
THEN FUCKING TELL ME YOU WANT A STEAK WHEN I ASK!!!
I'm not the best lately. I'm struggling.
I don't think I have post natal depression.
It's everything building up.
It's nothing to do with having two kids. I love both of them. Not wanting to shake them or anything.
I don't want them to go away so I can get some sleep, I want everything else to go away.
I want moving house to go away.
I want staph infection to go away.
I want blood pressure issues to go away.
I want money issues to go away.
I want it all to go away so I can get some sleep.
So my kids don't suffer.
So Pat doesn't suffer.
So I don't suffer!
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Dolores Rose
You are four weeks old today.Four weeks that have flown by so fast.
Amongst moving house, having a staph infection and a toddler I feel like I might have put you second a little.
Not that you mind one bit. You are the happiest baby (although you do spew a lot).
I haven't taken anywhere near as many photos as I would have liked to.
It scares me I won't get the time back and I don't have any records of it. I promise I'll get the camera out. I'll capture you in all your newborn glory.
Especially with your big brother. He ADORES you. Every chance he is asking to kiss you or cuddle you or hold you.
He uses kissing you as a way to extend his bed time just that little longer (but it's so cute I let him).
You have started being more alert. You are awake for longer and you're recognising us.
You LOVE your Daddy. You stare at him for ages.
I can't wait to watch you grow. You're beautiful. You have completed our family.
Love Mummy.
x
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
Still here!
Sorry it's been a while for anyone who actually reads my blog regularly.
This is just a catch up post to promise you I AM still here.
Having a four week old (4 weeks tomorrow - it's insane) a toddler and moving back in with your parents is a pretty full on experience! Add to that learning how to cook for six people and have left overs...
I will sit down properly over the next couple of days and tell you all about it, but for now, just know I'm still here!
x
This is just a catch up post to promise you I AM still here.
Having a four week old (4 weeks tomorrow - it's insane) a toddler and moving back in with your parents is a pretty full on experience! Add to that learning how to cook for six people and have left overs...
I will sit down properly over the next couple of days and tell you all about it, but for now, just know I'm still here!
x
Friday, May 6, 2011
sometimes, I hate you.
I have a confession.
Right now, I feel like a terrible mother.
Which is better than how I felt this morning.
Right now, I'm sick. I have a staph infection - so I'm pretty run down. I have a newborn who loves feeding for two hours and then throwing it all up again, so she's hungry. But only does it at night. We also drove 2.5 hours home from Pat's dad's house, getting home at midnight.
It's still no excuse, but I thought I'd give you the background.
Miraculously, Dolores slept for a good 5 hour block last night, woke at 5:30am for a feed. Then Dex started SCREAMING.
He was still tired - over tired, but refused to go back to sleep.
He wouldn't stop screaming.
I was exhausted.
I was screaming.
I yelled at him "Sometimes I hate you!"
And then I burst into tears.
Because I don't. And I didn't mean it.
And I instantly wished I could take it back.
What I meant to say was, I hate the way you're behaving right now. Not I hate you. Never, I hate you.
I felt terrible. I still do.
I got him up and gave him breakfast and we snuggled and watched How to Train your Dragon. After a little while I asked him if he wanted to go back to sleep and he did.
We all went back to sleep.
But I still feel so bad.
And so, SO grateful that he is too young to ever remember what I said to him.
Have you said something you regretted to your child?
Right now, I feel like a terrible mother.
Which is better than how I felt this morning.
Right now, I'm sick. I have a staph infection - so I'm pretty run down. I have a newborn who loves feeding for two hours and then throwing it all up again, so she's hungry. But only does it at night. We also drove 2.5 hours home from Pat's dad's house, getting home at midnight.
It's still no excuse, but I thought I'd give you the background.
Miraculously, Dolores slept for a good 5 hour block last night, woke at 5:30am for a feed. Then Dex started SCREAMING.
He was still tired - over tired, but refused to go back to sleep.
He wouldn't stop screaming.
I was exhausted.
I was screaming.
I yelled at him "Sometimes I hate you!"
And then I burst into tears.
Because I don't. And I didn't mean it.
And I instantly wished I could take it back.
What I meant to say was, I hate the way you're behaving right now. Not I hate you. Never, I hate you.
I felt terrible. I still do.
I got him up and gave him breakfast and we snuggled and watched How to Train your Dragon. After a little while I asked him if he wanted to go back to sleep and he did.
We all went back to sleep.
But I still feel so bad.
And so, SO grateful that he is too young to ever remember what I said to him.
Have you said something you regretted to your child?
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
Make Believe
Do you ever pretend you're not a mummy?
I've tried.
A couple of times. I was bad at it the first time, so I figured I'd try again.
I suck at it.
I can't comprehend how (or why) mother's can pretend they don't have a little person(s) at home that they love and are responsible for and who's lives they revolve around.
It doesn't seem natural.
I understand needing a break occasionally. God knows I do.
The last two weeks would have been hell if Pat wasn't here to help with both Dex and Dolores.
But would I ever pretend I don't have them? NO way.
They are what I was born to do.
I mean sure - there will be other things in my life as well, but nothing as important as them.
Why would I pretend they didn't exist?
Even just for a little bit?
It's like pretending you don't have a soul. Or are missing an arm. Painful and pointless.
If you want to pretend you don't have children, why did you have them in the first place?
I'm definitely not saying you should have your children in tow 24/7. That is just silly. You'd go insane.
Sometimes even going to the doctors is a welcome break here!
I won a $300 spa voucher and I'm planning on getting the 5 hour full treatment.
But will I pretend my kids don't exist? No way. They are the reason I deserve my treatment.
What do you think?
Do you pretend you don't have kids sometimes?
I've tried.
A couple of times. I was bad at it the first time, so I figured I'd try again.
I suck at it.
I can't comprehend how (or why) mother's can pretend they don't have a little person(s) at home that they love and are responsible for and who's lives they revolve around.
It doesn't seem natural.
I understand needing a break occasionally. God knows I do.
The last two weeks would have been hell if Pat wasn't here to help with both Dex and Dolores.
But would I ever pretend I don't have them? NO way.
They are what I was born to do.
I mean sure - there will be other things in my life as well, but nothing as important as them.
Why would I pretend they didn't exist?
Even just for a little bit?
It's like pretending you don't have a soul. Or are missing an arm. Painful and pointless.
If you want to pretend you don't have children, why did you have them in the first place?
I'm definitely not saying you should have your children in tow 24/7. That is just silly. You'd go insane.
Sometimes even going to the doctors is a welcome break here!
I won a $300 spa voucher and I'm planning on getting the 5 hour full treatment.
But will I pretend my kids don't exist? No way. They are the reason I deserve my treatment.
What do you think?
Do you pretend you don't have kids sometimes?
Sunday, May 1, 2011
Monday Must-Do's
- Dex Daycare
- Midwife - 11am
- Centrelink 11:30am
- Make Welsh cakes (this is the grandnanna's recipe of the week)
- Stuff for Tina
- Send stuff to Nat
- Doctor for me
- Stuff for Pam
- Quilt to dry cleaner (they didn't clean it last time?!? the cat wee'd on it. We can tell it wasn't done!)
- Stuff to Tupperware
- Tafe application.
As you can see, we have a lot of "Stuff" laying around. HOPEFULLY that *stuff* won't still be on next Monday's must-do's!
What's on your list today?
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